Roommates

A new solution to my rental issues has presented itself: The Dreaded Roommate.

Faithful readers (or people who can scroll down about 50 lines to read yesterdays post) know that I’m being forced to move due to a ridiculous non-smoking policy and on top of that they are going to be raising my rent. Bastards.

So my options are A: take it in the keyster, B: find a new place to live that’s cheaper and isn’t run by Nazis, or C: find myself a roommate.

Now, Option C is something that I’ve been considering for a while. I mean, I make ok money, but I’m certainly not lighting Cuban Cigars with $100 bills. And while I suppose I could find a place that saves me $100-$200 a month and it would help, it doesn’t seem to be the kind of long term financial solution that I need. But, if I could add a roommate to split costs, that could potentially be $500-$700 a month that I could save. That’s a lot of money. Just one month buys me that IKEA dresser so I don’t have to have piles of clothing on the floor. Two months and I’ve got that new computer I’ve been dreaming about.

However, with a roommate comes the very real “douche bag” risk factor. I mean, I have no idea how to even find a roommate.

I can’t live with friends. Not only do I not have any friends who need places to live, but moreover, in my experience, living with friends leads to them not being friends any more. It’s not that I hate them or they hate me, but we already know everything about each other. We already have little things that annoy each other and living together only acerbates them.

So what do you do? Can you trust the people you find on www.roommates.com ? I suppose you have to. Besides, there’s no reason that they necessarily have to be psychopaths just because they posted on a website. Maybe all they need is an effective screening process. I think I have a place that would be in demand – great building, lots of space, 60” TV, etc. – so finding someone that wants to live with me shouldn’t be a problem. But finding someone that I want to live with? There’s the rub.

Maybe if I required that they meet me for drinks at a bar before we made any sort of commitment. I have to imagine that one night with cocktails would tell me pretty accurately if I’d be able to stand someone for 12 months. I mean, there’s the chance that they do an excellent job of hiding their crazy that first night. And there’s always the chance that even if things start out well, they end up badly after a year – but there’s also the other possibility, right? That this weird process would end up with me finding a new best friend? Who knows? Maybe he will have a hot, smart, funny, single sister.

I think it’s worth the adventure. How bad could it be? Don’t answer that. At least if I end up chopped up in to tiny little bits in the closet of my now shared apartment, I’d do it with a new dresser and a kick-ass computer.